LJCoffee's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[That crazy mario]

Why oh why do these things pass?

Yeah - I know that this will get through the portal... I just don't know why...

These crappy sprite movies suck more than your sister at a "Winger" concert (don't feel bad man - my sister was probably there as well)

but STILL! - you can use Flash - that much you've shown us - now make something original - stop relying on sprite fans and parody legacy points to get your submissions through!

I know you can do it - I think you can, I think you can, I think you can, I think you can...

good luck...

Zelfury responds:

wow thanks man this is some of the best advice i have ever gotton, and i know u liked the movie a little ;) but truth is i can animate in flash but i usally do sprites at home and cartoons at school, and i cant submit anything at school cause ng is blocked but thanks man

[50FPS Fun]

wow!

The reviews come rollin' in!

"It was better than 'Cats'"
- random internet shithead

"Next time I'm taking the whole family!"
- John Q. Jackhole

"I want to have their babies"
- Trisha Luvbucket (lot 219 - way in the back)

"DAMNIT! I thought this was a knox movie"
- some NG retard

j00bie responds:

"Shut the fuck up"
- j00bie

[Lethal Sneezes]

Not great

Not terrible either though - I guess...

I'm giving you the benefit of doubt here though as I could SWEAR that I've seen something VERY similar to this not to long ago...

Maybe you based your work on something you've seen - I dunno...

Not completely terrible - you did a half-assed job on the animations (which is better than alot of submissions) but it wasn't very funny overall....

faye-smith responds:

Yeah, that submission was mine, but i'd just got flash it was stick people, so i redid it... I didn't do it half-assed thankyou very much! it's mostly FBF

[CRAP (special edition)]

Not a single rotating dog...

The last one was most likely blammed because there weren't any clocks, fruit, muffins, pube-muppets or synthesized voices in it...

Good job. Could have been a bit longer - I think you could've gotten two or three other software error jokes crammed in there - but either way it was good overall...

Keep it up!

Melchior898 responds:

you hate cc aswell? thank god.. (hates clock crew)

i would have liked to make it longer, but you know how flash is.. i just wanted it to end. but.. meh. it could have been better, or longer... but yeah.

[Fluete]

Beautiful.

That was an excellent submission.

There were a few minor problems with the sound (only in spots and it COULD be on my end)

I'm not even about to find fault though - that was simply beautiful.

Very much worthy of the front page.

Keep it up...

neeko responds:

Yeah, sorry about the music. There was some editing with the music to break up some scenes to allow slower computers to see it, but in the end, try to please everyone just made matters worse. Thanks again for the comment.

[The Morning Show Intro]

Nice animation

Ran fine on my machine - in the future though, if you're worried about quality settings on other peoples machines just define it in your file...

Just add it to your first frame - use the following:

_quality = "LOW";

You can also use "MEDIUM" , "HIGH" and "BEST"

You can use this at any point in any timeline - if you want you can even whip up a little logic that will determine how many frames of your animation have played within a set number of milliseconds and adjust the quality based on that - this way your swf will auto adjust to the fastest possible playback rate for the specific machine that it is viewed on...

Sorry - went off on a tangent there...
Once again - Nice job - you're a very good animator!

Stryker427 responds:

oh wow this is really helpful!! >< sheesh i def. could use this! Thank you so much!!!

[In memory of M.L.K.]

Whatever...

Dude, if you hate this country so much, get the fuck out...

Here's an idea - I'll vote to spend money on a MILITARY defense against terrorism and you pray to God to protect you and let's see who gets killed first...

Now that the politics are out of the way...

Not a bad piece of flash work - it served its purpose - You should consider reworking it - change up the background a bit here and there and update the photos. the music isn't bad but it's not great either - you could take this speech and set it to something much better, maybe adjust the timing here and there for impact.
Your flash work isn't bad - our political ideals appear to differ but I guess that's what the first ammendment was intended for eh?

Bashing on Bush is one thing - but DONT bash our country - if you live here keep in mind that the very system you bitch about is the only thing that allows you the right to bitch at all...

Bushflash responds:

When have I EVER bashed USA? I am a patriot! you are overlooking something

[The Foursome intro]

Needs work

- this wasn't "very random" - in fact it seems that alot of people are starting to interpret the word "random" to mean "I can't think of a story or plot so I'll string a bunch of non connected thoughts together" which is not random at all - it's the same every time you view it - but I digress...

The tweens: your fades were not done very well - there was ALOT of ghosting on your symbols...

The bus: you made a mistake I've seen several times before - SOME symbols look fine when flipped but not if they have text on them - it's easy enough to copy the symbol, flip it and keep the text the correct way...

The plot(?): NOTHING happened in your submission - Here's the story as I saw it:
Four guys are waiting for a bus. The bus, driven by an undead gargoyle, comes speeding up and they get on it. The end...
...yawn...

swish1 responds:

Hey Thanx fur the tips

[The Surface of the Water]

Really nice work

Nice style, the use of a monochromatic color scheme worked very well for this piece. This wasn't what I was expecting - which is a really good thing ... I could make a few suggestions but to be honest, your work is probably best left as yours - as soon as you start listening to retards like me you'll lose that unique quality that made me appreciate this submission as much as I did. I'd love to see more from you - you're quite talented (and brother, I don't put that in too many reviews!) Sedona huh? I used to be stuck down in Yuma but I escaped. - but I digress... -

Great job!

BlackmarketKraig responds:

Oy! It's SOOO hot it Yuma! Yikes!

Anyway, thanks for the awesome review and score! :D

[Penguin Jam 4]

Three crappy submissions for the price of one!

Too bad I won't get three blam points for it...

cool-penguin-0 responds:

Yes, you won't get any blam points!